A few months ago, on Facebook, eveyrone was doing "25 random things". So, I followed the trend then and wrote the following:
1. I want to be a professional student forever!
2. I am only 1/4 Burmese.
3. I think of people often at the most random times.
4. I don't have time for stupids..
5. I don't keep feelings to myself: if I'm mad at you, you'll know I'm mad at you.
6. I don't forgive / forget others (except my immediate family -- they're angels in my eyes.)
7. I have a niece and a nephew I adore.
8. My goal is life: to preserve the memories for other generations to see.
9. I'd do anything for my kids.
10. I made Chris walk my babies, even though he had a kidney stone. hee hee. my defense: I didn't know he had a kidney stone then.
11. I am "thrifty".
12. therefore, there are lots of "oh, I can do that in a few minutes" type of projects.
13. I have TONS of projects that I plan to accomplish when I have "downtime".
14. Downtime doesn't come too often for me.
15. I don't text and don't respond to text -- cuz it's 10 cents per text!! And it takes forever and a day to type a message. (The last time I texted was last year to M.G.)
16. I hate fake people.
17. I have lots of anger issues.
18. I don't have time for stupids. Wait..did I say this one already? Cuz it's true. I don't have time for stupids.
19. I hate cry babies. whah wah.... "you're mean to me" or "you hurted my feeligns when you said...." wah wah. My response: SHUT UP! SHUT UP!
20. It takes a while for me to befriend someone -- I tend to "screen" my friends. If you can't handle my bitchyness (which I tend to portray on purpose) from the beginning of our relationship, then you don't deserve to see my good side.
21. I get emotional very easily.
22. I've been crying for any/all the love stories, even the cheesiest ones. The latest movies I cried for: 27 dresses, Juno, Enchanted, Made of Honor, Sex and the City, on and on..
23. I hate needy people who don't help themselves. They'd rather count on others than to do things on their own. Hold your own weight damn it!
24. I love kids, BUT only for a few minutes (max: an hour to two). Then, I'd like to return them! ha ha ha.
25. And I have very emotional dreams at times -- I sometimes wake up crying and very upset because of these dreams...
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Inconsiderate or not... (our house accomodation dilema)
The word of the day: "inconsiderate"!!!
According to Merriam Webster, it means "heedless, thoughtless" or "careless of the rights or feelings of others".
Why am I mentioning this?
Because....
Well, let me give you a little background first. Mr. JB works all day long. And me, I don't work but I go to school full time and stress about school ALL the time. And when we sent out the invitations, I thought our families will be excited to go and book their trips. Well, that wasn't the case. They were excited to go but NOBODY took charge to book anything.
So, guess what that meant? Yeap..it meant, my controlling self took over and searched for flights and lodging and everything. I was in contact with a travel agent from the beginning and asked regarding the pricing and such. I searched and searched, hoping to find something for everyone.... Mind you, this was also while I was working my butt off in school.
And it lead me to calculate every possible situations.... What if our families rented a house? Or condos? And just buy the flight and book our car rentals? EVERY possible situations I could've thought of. I wanted everyone to enjoy their time in Maui and have a great time while trying to save money as well. I calculated every thing and priced it out for everyone. I emailed different situations with all the pricing hoping to get feedback. Well, let's just say I didn't get a lot of feedbacks. I mean, I got "book it" from my sister/brother in law and my parents, who didn't really care where they stayed as long as they are there. My brother complained a bit cuz he thought it will cost his family $10K to go there for a week. (Don't ask what he was thinking; I had to school him to say that it's not even going to cost us that much and we're going to honeymoon too.) And Mr. JB's family (his mom, younger brother and stepdad) said "oh whatever works".
After all the work of research, we realized that it will be cheaper to get the flight and car from costco and to rent a house. I mentioned this before: this place has a main house and a cottage house. The main house has 4 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms but fits 10 people. The cottage house has 1 bedroom and 1 bathroom but fits 4 people. We were going to do the following arrangement:
1. my mom and dad
2. my sister and brother in law
3. my brother and sister in law plus two kids and her mother
4. my in laws (all three of them)
and the cottage house will be for Mr. JB and I.
And my 2 aunts from my mom's side will stay with my cousin and his wife in a condo. Everyone's set, right? My only hesitant is that there'd be too many people in the main house.
So, we played with the idea of getting a condo for my in laws. But we didn't finalize anything.....
And I calculated some more as to how we were going to achieve our goals. Our goals were to make sure that people are there to have their vacation of a lifetime while maintaining comfort and being budget friendly.
And then a ranch was thrown into my pot. My cousin and his wife decided that they were no longer going. BUT both of my aunts decided they were going. Now, where am I going to put those two into our arrangements?
Mr. JB and I had a long talk about the living arrangments for everyone. And we talked some more the day after..and some more. I came up with different options.
And we decided that it was best to do the following arrangment:
1. mom and dad
2. sis and bro in law
3. two aunts
4. my in laws
that's for the main house.
And for the small cottage house, we will put my brother's family there. And Mr. JB and I will stay in a condo. This will save EVERYONE money, including us. Mr. JB and I will be paying 1/2 of what we would've paid if we stayed at the cottage and my brother's family will save about $200+. And for Mr. JB's family, staying in the main house will cost about $300 less, compared to what it would've cost if they were to stay in a one bedroom condo.
So...if anyone in my family or his family thinks that their feelings were not considered while I made these arrangements, I only have two words for them: BITE ME!!! ha ha ha. All they had to do was give me their money while I made these arrangements. I stressed about these darn arrangements while I stressed about school.
And I wouldn't have to worry about these arrangments if they all had their own money to spend as they please. But of course, during this hard economy time, not a lot of people have loads of money to spend. And I understand that COMPLETELY. BUT you also have to know that if you don't have the money to spend, you shouldn't complain too much either. Not that I'm saying you should settled for whatever....but I am saying that you should be happy to be going to Maui for the amount you're paying. Everyone is paying ~$1300 per person or less for a week vacation at Maui, which includes direct flight, place to stay and car rental. I'd say: that's a great price.
Don't get me wrong: I am appreciative of all of our family members that are going. I appreciate that they are taking their vacation time and are spending their hard earn money to go watch Mr. JB and I celebrate our love for each other...
According to Merriam Webster, it means "heedless, thoughtless" or "careless of the rights or feelings of others".
Why am I mentioning this?
Because....
Well, let me give you a little background first. Mr. JB works all day long. And me, I don't work but I go to school full time and stress about school ALL the time. And when we sent out the invitations, I thought our families will be excited to go and book their trips. Well, that wasn't the case. They were excited to go but NOBODY took charge to book anything.
So, guess what that meant? Yeap..it meant, my controlling self took over and searched for flights and lodging and everything. I was in contact with a travel agent from the beginning and asked regarding the pricing and such. I searched and searched, hoping to find something for everyone.... Mind you, this was also while I was working my butt off in school.
And it lead me to calculate every possible situations.... What if our families rented a house? Or condos? And just buy the flight and book our car rentals? EVERY possible situations I could've thought of. I wanted everyone to enjoy their time in Maui and have a great time while trying to save money as well. I calculated every thing and priced it out for everyone. I emailed different situations with all the pricing hoping to get feedback. Well, let's just say I didn't get a lot of feedbacks. I mean, I got "book it" from my sister/brother in law and my parents, who didn't really care where they stayed as long as they are there. My brother complained a bit cuz he thought it will cost his family $10K to go there for a week. (Don't ask what he was thinking; I had to school him to say that it's not even going to cost us that much and we're going to honeymoon too.) And Mr. JB's family (his mom, younger brother and stepdad) said "oh whatever works".
After all the work of research, we realized that it will be cheaper to get the flight and car from costco and to rent a house. I mentioned this before: this place has a main house and a cottage house. The main house has 4 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms but fits 10 people. The cottage house has 1 bedroom and 1 bathroom but fits 4 people. We were going to do the following arrangement:
1. my mom and dad
2. my sister and brother in law
3. my brother and sister in law plus two kids and her mother
4. my in laws (all three of them)
and the cottage house will be for Mr. JB and I.
And my 2 aunts from my mom's side will stay with my cousin and his wife in a condo. Everyone's set, right? My only hesitant is that there'd be too many people in the main house.
So, we played with the idea of getting a condo for my in laws. But we didn't finalize anything.....
And I calculated some more as to how we were going to achieve our goals. Our goals were to make sure that people are there to have their vacation of a lifetime while maintaining comfort and being budget friendly.
And then a ranch was thrown into my pot. My cousin and his wife decided that they were no longer going. BUT both of my aunts decided they were going. Now, where am I going to put those two into our arrangements?
Mr. JB and I had a long talk about the living arrangments for everyone. And we talked some more the day after..and some more. I came up with different options.
And we decided that it was best to do the following arrangment:
1. mom and dad
2. sis and bro in law
3. two aunts
4. my in laws
that's for the main house.
And for the small cottage house, we will put my brother's family there. And Mr. JB and I will stay in a condo. This will save EVERYONE money, including us. Mr. JB and I will be paying 1/2 of what we would've paid if we stayed at the cottage and my brother's family will save about $200+. And for Mr. JB's family, staying in the main house will cost about $300 less, compared to what it would've cost if they were to stay in a one bedroom condo.
So...if anyone in my family or his family thinks that their feelings were not considered while I made these arrangements, I only have two words for them: BITE ME!!! ha ha ha. All they had to do was give me their money while I made these arrangements. I stressed about these darn arrangements while I stressed about school.
And I wouldn't have to worry about these arrangments if they all had their own money to spend as they please. But of course, during this hard economy time, not a lot of people have loads of money to spend. And I understand that COMPLETELY. BUT you also have to know that if you don't have the money to spend, you shouldn't complain too much either. Not that I'm saying you should settled for whatever....but I am saying that you should be happy to be going to Maui for the amount you're paying. Everyone is paying ~$1300 per person or less for a week vacation at Maui, which includes direct flight, place to stay and car rental. I'd say: that's a great price.
Don't get me wrong: I am appreciative of all of our family members that are going. I appreciate that they are taking their vacation time and are spending their hard earn money to go watch Mr. JB and I celebrate our love for each other...
Saturday, May 30, 2009
I'm very proud of my mister
Yes siree...
I'm very proud of him..
Why? Well, simply because he's MY man! ha ha. Okay..enough corniess.
Today, he proved to me that he has been listening to me venting all these times..and he showed me how much he cares for me and for us. He had a conversation with someone recently and he told me about their conversation. Without going into details, he stood up for us! I'm so happy. Words cannot describe it.
Okay..bye now. =)
I'm very proud of him..
Why? Well, simply because he's MY man! ha ha. Okay..enough corniess.
Today, he proved to me that he has been listening to me venting all these times..and he showed me how much he cares for me and for us. He had a conversation with someone recently and he told me about their conversation. Without going into details, he stood up for us! I'm so happy. Words cannot describe it.
Okay..bye now. =)
Our very FIRST wedding gift..
Yes yes yes..
We got our very first wedding gift!
It's courtesy of my friend Harmony. She came to my graduation and brought a wedding gift for Mr. JB and me. During the graduation lunch, she kept saying it was an ice cream maker. I said, ice cream maker? Really?
And then we came home and she wanted us to open the gift. So, I did...
And guess what we got...
KITCHEN AID TOASTER ... in RED!!!
Harm said we can start using it...but Mr. JB thinks we should wait until we start our new lives together. So, we'll wait until AFTER we get married...
Thanks Harm!
We got our very first wedding gift!
It's courtesy of my friend Harmony. She came to my graduation and brought a wedding gift for Mr. JB and me. During the graduation lunch, she kept saying it was an ice cream maker. I said, ice cream maker? Really?
And then we came home and she wanted us to open the gift. So, I did...
And guess what we got...
KITCHEN AID TOASTER ... in RED!!!
Harm said we can start using it...but Mr. JB thinks we should wait until we start our new lives together. So, we'll wait until AFTER we get married...
Thanks Harm!
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Productive day in deed
Today, I was a bit irritated because I had to wait for a plumber for our neighbor downstairs. And the guy didn't speak English and I sort of understood his Chinese. We were able to communicate fine for most part but he took forever and a day. I was hoping to get some studying time in but I didn't. I had to keep going downstairs to check what was going on. It took him a long time to unclog the hair and other stuff.
It took me a while to get to my mom's. But of course the J Crew packages were there and such. And after trying on the dresses, I also worked on getting my two aunts booked for their flights. And they are going with my brother and his family, which is cool with me! I'm excited because the flight came out to be cheaper than I had originally thought.
I now officially have 25 people who are attending our wedding. =)
So...it was a productive day after all. I actually did what I was supposed to do for the wedding....=)
And just like that....
Just like that, my search for the dress is OVER! Yes, ladies and gents...my dress search is over. It is all because of Mr. Crew. J. Crew to be exact.
I got the following three dresses from J. Crew.
I received the first one and I showed it to Mr. JB. And you know what he said: "Ohhh..wow..". I liked that reaction. The dress was really pretty and it flowed like a princess dress. I really liked it but I didn't want to jump the gun and make a decision without trying on the other two dresses.
Well, today, I went by my mom's house and tried on the dresses. They were all so pretty. I tried them on and whowed it to my mom, and my two aunts. There were different opinions amongst them. I also showed it to Mr. JB and he gave me his opinions too.
Oh in case you were wondering, yes, Mr. JB does get to see what the dresses look like on me. Initially, I was trying to hide it cuz I thought that was THE thing to do. BUT you know what? It's not me. I like his opinions on things. Especially cuz I'm very indecisive.
Anyhoo...yes, the dress search is over! I know..it was like 6 months of shopping. hee hee. I was getting worried a little bit because I thought I will end up going to David's Bridal and rushing them for a dress..but now, I'm relief.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Just a Dog?
In case you haven't figured it out, I am a dog lover. (And a cat lover.) My "kids" mean a lot to me and they are MY LOVES!!! I go googoogaga over them and it's because I love them with all my heart. I can't imagine how I will deal if one of them passes away. Just thinking about it makes me want to cry.
But some people just don't understand. Especially the people with kids. They seem to think their kids are more valuable than my kids. So annoying. To those people, I have this (click on it to view it larger!):
But some people just don't understand. Especially the people with kids. They seem to think their kids are more valuable than my kids. So annoying. To those people, I have this (click on it to view it larger!):
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Sigh....such a relief..
Well, it's official.
I am officially done with school! (Well, for now until I go back to get my BSN or MSN.)
Thursday May 21st of 2009: I had my last final. I walked out thinking "oh man, please let me pass". This was another way of me saying "please let me get the grade I want". I wasn't afraid of failing out of the class or the program. You see, I went in knowing that I would still pass the course with a C even if I got 50% on the final exam. BUT of course, I didn't want a C.
I studied my butt off, but as always, I felt like there wasn't enough time for me to get through everything. I went in thinking "just do the best you can and see what happens". But I was nervous as heck. I didn't want to fail. The very LAST quarter. Can you imagine what I would've felt like if I didn't do so hot? Geez. Talk about wasting 2 years of my life.
And the test was hard! I was like..HUH? I went home thinking "oh well". Our teacher told us before test started that she was going to email our results tonight. So, I waited by the computer. Waited.....and waited....and waited. Then,around 7 p.m., my teacher emailed us to say:
"Preliminary results indicate all have passed the class - I am going out to eat, then will email until my fingers fall off later!
Leaving my computer now!
Janis"
WHAT!!! I've been waiting. So, I emailed her back to ask why she was messing with us. Ha ha. Yes, my teacher is cool like that. =) And I waited some more. I was thinking, I'm sure she'll only take about an hour to eat her dinner, right? Well...i waited some more. And waited...and waited. At 11 p.m., I told myself to go to sleep. And the next day, at 9:11 a.m., she replied me with my grade. I passed!!!! Whoo hoo!! Oh...and with the grade I was expecting. hee hee.
While I was waiting for my teacher to email us our grade, I walked my princess Bash and while I was walking, I had this weird feeling. Usually, I'm thinking about what other projects I needed to do for school. But that night, I felt so relief. My body felt a bit more loose and light. Weird.
But that feeling was short lived, because I had another project I had to work on for school. You see, we're going to be pinned on May 30th. So, I was working on a slideshow for all my classmates and their families to see. It took a while because I wanted to make sure that EVERYONE's pictures were included. And we have 53 people who are graduating. So, it took me many hours to search for the right pictures.
And yesterday, we had our rehearsal and we showed the slideshow. Everyone loved it. I still had to fix some things here and there but now, it's done.
Also, today, my classmates stated that they received their appointment to test letter. Well, I don't have mine yet cuz my mail goes to my mom.....
I am feeling kinda nervous again because I know I have to study for the NCLEX but until then I still need to study my butt off... But yes..I'm still relief that I'm done with school. Whoo hoo!
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Another attempt at finding a dress....
Well, remember how I told you I was having some issues with my dresses and the alteration lady told me to look for another dress? I took her advice (for now) and went to J.Crew to order me some dresses today. Of course, I still don't want to spend thousands of dollars on a dress. So, I ordered 3 dresses and here's the summary:
merchandise total: $1,015.00
gift options: $0.00
subtotal: $1,015.00
promotions: $(18.50)
shipping & handling: $0.00
tax: $93.89
order total: $1,108.89
gift card redemption amount: $0.00
total charge: $1,108.89
For all three dressess, it's $1,109.89!! That's pretty good, I think. LUCKILY, I found a coupon code for free shipping!! Whoo hoo!!! I don't know how other people do it with shopping online. I mean, all the shipping costs will just kill my wallet. Of course, I also had to make sure that the J Crew retailer store was going to accept the exchanges too.
So, I'm going to try on these dresses and hopefully I like one of them. Let's cross our fingers and toes, shall we?
If not, David's Bridal, here I come!
merchandise total: $1,015.00
gift options: $0.00
subtotal: $1,015.00
promotions: $(18.50)
shipping & handling: $0.00
tax: $93.89
order total: $1,108.89
gift card redemption amount: $0.00
total charge: $1,108.89
For all three dressess, it's $1,109.89!! That's pretty good, I think. LUCKILY, I found a coupon code for free shipping!! Whoo hoo!!! I don't know how other people do it with shopping online. I mean, all the shipping costs will just kill my wallet. Of course, I also had to make sure that the J Crew retailer store was going to accept the exchanges too.
So, I'm going to try on these dresses and hopefully I like one of them. Let's cross our fingers and toes, shall we?
If not, David's Bridal, here I come!
Sunday, May 10, 2009
If I could turn back time...
If you had a chance to turn back time...what would you do differently?
I'm thinking I would have a small wedding at City Hall and save the money to either travel or to buy a house. We toyed with this idea for a few minutes (yeah, just minutes) but Mr. JB thought that I would regret this decision. And he may be right. And I'm not sure if I am feeling this way right now because I'm being frugal at this moment due to the recent economy development. Who knows.
But here's what I'm thinking at this current moment: we would have our intimate wedding ceremony at our lovely city hall (look here for more pictures!) with just our immediate family members (the ones that are going to Hawaii). I will wear a white short dress with color heels and Mr. JB will wear a suit. And of course, bright bold bouquet. And after our ceremony, we will go to Cliff House Restaurant and have a great yummy dinner. Oh what a day it will be.
But here's the thing: I know we wouldn't use the money to travel or buy a house because....I'm not working. We would feel guilty for spending $20K to travel for a few weeks. And because I'm not working, I would feel stressed to enter a big committment like buying a house. IF I got a job in few months after finishing school, then of course, we would've had the money needed for our down payment. BUT ... would I have regretted the decision of having a small wedding at a local area? Maybe... Maybe not. Who knows!
I've been threaded...=)
: picture courtesy of flickr
We were at Stonestown mall, doing some shopping and we noticed that there's a "threading" cart. You know, the carts that are in the middle of the mall? Well, I was curious and stopped to look at the video. One of the girls there offered to do the top of the eyebrows for free and if I like it, then she can do my whole eyebrows for $15. I said, oh sure. And she threaded and I sweated and felt pain, and then I looked at the mirror. I swear the top of my right eyebrow looked bare. It was like, whoa lady, you took too much off. But Mr. JB was there and he said it looked fine. I was shocked!! But I said, oh just do the whole thing. So, after some more sweating, I looked at my face and said, "oh not so bad".
And the lady offered us this deal where you can get as much threading you need for the next three months for $40, and I don't have to pay for this threading session either!! So, Mr. JB and I went to the side to decide to see if the $40 was worth it. I can thread again for my graduation and for our wedding. So, if I just come here two more time, then the entire card will be worth it. That being said, I folded and bought that card for $40. What do you think of the result..?
:I don't like my brows too thin and I just wanted to have it cleaned up a bit without taking out any portion. So, it's a little thicker than what some of you may like. Oh well. hee hee.
What a disappointment!!!!
I'm not sure if I told you all about the dress I ordered. I received it and it was a bit loose in the shoulder area and such. But I thought it would be so easy to take in. So, I didn't think it will cost me a sh!t load of money to have it altered.
Well...I was wrong. I was budgeting $150 to have my dress altered. I took it to the shop and the lady looked at it and pin it in 2 places under my arm area and said it will cost $180! What? And then the neckline area needed to be adjusted as well because it was way too high up there and she said it will cost you a lot more. She said, "Don't do it". It will cost you about $400 and you can get a nice looking dress that fits you for $400. Think about it before you decide to have it altered.
WHAT!!! I thought my search for my wedding dress was all over. And now, I have to look at some more. UGH!! Of course, this time, I'm going to try J.Crew. There are a few dresses in my budget that I like. We shall see.
Don't get me wrong. I'm glad that lady told me the honest truth. And she's right. Having to pay $400 for alteration is just not very smart when I can get another prettier dress for $400 that will fit me to the T.
I also contacted my dressmaker to see if he will alter it for me and he said he will, at free of charge and will express mail it back. So, I'm going to ship it and see what he can do for me. But I will keep looking at J. Crew for more ideas..
Well...I was wrong. I was budgeting $150 to have my dress altered. I took it to the shop and the lady looked at it and pin it in 2 places under my arm area and said it will cost $180! What? And then the neckline area needed to be adjusted as well because it was way too high up there and she said it will cost you a lot more. She said, "Don't do it". It will cost you about $400 and you can get a nice looking dress that fits you for $400. Think about it before you decide to have it altered.
WHAT!!! I thought my search for my wedding dress was all over. And now, I have to look at some more. UGH!! Of course, this time, I'm going to try J.Crew. There are a few dresses in my budget that I like. We shall see.
Don't get me wrong. I'm glad that lady told me the honest truth. And she's right. Having to pay $400 for alteration is just not very smart when I can get another prettier dress for $400 that will fit me to the T.
I also contacted my dressmaker to see if he will alter it for me and he said he will, at free of charge and will express mail it back. So, I'm going to ship it and see what he can do for me. But I will keep looking at J. Crew for more ideas..
Monday, May 4, 2009
A good friend...
A classmate of mine, who I considers as a friend said: "just because people don't go to your wedding, that doesn't mean they care less about you".
I don't have a lot of friends and those I do have, I consider them dear. And when I started school, I remember a few people saying that you will make friends that will last you a life time. I didn't believe it. And it wasn't until recently (maybe cuz I'm graduating now..) I realized that there are a few that I can call "my friends".
Meet L.W. She and I have always "hogged" the front seats of each class. Me, cuz I hate "missing out" on my teachers' lectures. I feel like I hear them better and I understand better when i'm up there. And so, last year, when we had to have our class at night time, L.W. and I ended up sitting next to each other. So, we got to talking and believe it or not, there's someone that thinks that people are stupid, as much as I do! ha ha. Of course, there are other qualities I like about her too: her honesty, her smartness, her humor, etc. And I remember some people telling me that she looks stern and that she rolls her eyes too much and such. Of course, I never noticed. That might have been because when there's a situation that calls for rolling eyes, I'm also doing it. ha ha.
Well, we became more talkative since that quarter of school. And of course, she knows my likes and dislikes and I've told her about our wedding plan and such. Well, today was like every other day in lecture. I was telling her about my emotional breakdown yesterday and she said "just because people don't go to your wedding, that doesn't mean they care less about you". It put things in perspective for me, of course! I mean, this whole time, I felt kinda hurt that people don't care enough about me to go to our wedding. And then L.W. said that and I was like...well, that's true.
Oh damn her. I don't like it when she's right...ha ha. =) So, I'm all better now! Well, just for the time being. I may change my mind tomorrow and may start having emotional breakdown again. =)
Thanks L.W. for being a good friend!
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Emotions have taken over me...
I just cried my balls out to Mr. JB, as soon as he woke up from his nap. Poor thing. He didn't even know what was waiting for him as he was slowly trying to snap out of his nap.
I just saw my cousin on facebook and started talking to him about his situation and our wedding. And he made me cry. Well, okay, he didn't MAKE me cry. I just cried. A little background: this is my boy cousin that I'm close to. He's my mom's sister's son. We (all my mom's siblings and their children) all lived together and we grew up like each other's brothers/sisters.
Well, he and his wife are currently living at an in-law in DC. And because of the recent financial situations across the globe, his landlord's children are no longer able to help pay the mortgage. And his landlord basically asked them to move upstairs for almost twice the amount of rent my cousins are currently paying, so that they (the landlords) can live downstairs. Well, of course they don't want to pay double the rent. So, the landlord basically said, we're moving downstairs and we think it'd be best if you find a place. And you have until June.
So, my cousins thought: why pay for someone else's mortgage when we can get our own place? So, they started looking for a place. And you're probably wondering right now what this all has to do with me, right? Well...for them to get their own place, they have to use every penny that they have, right? And guess what? They haven't bought their air tickets to go to our wedding just yet cuz they were trying to figure things out with their vacation time. So, that means ... they're going to be using the money they saved to go to our wedding. Yeap. That means....they are no longer going to our wedding.
Of course, I'm totally bummed out and upset. I couldn't help myself. I mean, I understand where he's coming from -- an opportunity to own your own place! I'm totally happy for him. Believe me. This is a very exciting time for him and his wife. I totally understand. BUT I guess I'm also being selfish. How can he use the money he saved to go to our wedding? He said they were going to go for sure!!!
I don't know why I cried my balls out. I mean, it's not like i don't understand their situation. I totally do. I guess I'm more hurt because I think of him as one of the members of our family -- he's truly like a brother to me. And his wife and I became close after the front I gave her too. ha ha. How can someone I love dearly just deny the opportunity to see me on my special day?? Maybe I'm being selfish. I probably am. BUT he said!!!
:sob sob sob
Oh, to top it off, he said something like: "you know you're my favorite cousin". I said: "you're just saying that" and he said: "no I really meant it". That punk!! I don't even think he knows that he made me cry my balls out. ha ha.
I just saw my cousin on facebook and started talking to him about his situation and our wedding. And he made me cry. Well, okay, he didn't MAKE me cry. I just cried. A little background: this is my boy cousin that I'm close to. He's my mom's sister's son. We (all my mom's siblings and their children) all lived together and we grew up like each other's brothers/sisters.
Well, he and his wife are currently living at an in-law in DC. And because of the recent financial situations across the globe, his landlord's children are no longer able to help pay the mortgage. And his landlord basically asked them to move upstairs for almost twice the amount of rent my cousins are currently paying, so that they (the landlords) can live downstairs. Well, of course they don't want to pay double the rent. So, the landlord basically said, we're moving downstairs and we think it'd be best if you find a place. And you have until June.
So, my cousins thought: why pay for someone else's mortgage when we can get our own place? So, they started looking for a place. And you're probably wondering right now what this all has to do with me, right? Well...for them to get their own place, they have to use every penny that they have, right? And guess what? They haven't bought their air tickets to go to our wedding just yet cuz they were trying to figure things out with their vacation time. So, that means ... they're going to be using the money they saved to go to our wedding. Yeap. That means....they are no longer going to our wedding.
Of course, I'm totally bummed out and upset. I couldn't help myself. I mean, I understand where he's coming from -- an opportunity to own your own place! I'm totally happy for him. Believe me. This is a very exciting time for him and his wife. I totally understand. BUT I guess I'm also being selfish. How can he use the money he saved to go to our wedding? He said they were going to go for sure!!!
I don't know why I cried my balls out. I mean, it's not like i don't understand their situation. I totally do. I guess I'm more hurt because I think of him as one of the members of our family -- he's truly like a brother to me. And his wife and I became close after the front I gave her too. ha ha. How can someone I love dearly just deny the opportunity to see me on my special day?? Maybe I'm being selfish. I probably am. BUT he said!!!
:sob sob sob
Oh, to top it off, he said something like: "you know you're my favorite cousin". I said: "you're just saying that" and he said: "no I really meant it". That punk!! I don't even think he knows that he made me cry my balls out. ha ha.
Saturday, May 2, 2009
The key to a happy marriage is....
COMMUNICATION!!!
Yes Ladies and Gents...
I'm realizing that the key to a happy marriage is all about COMMUNICATION. Of course, I'm starting to notice various things about different relationships that surround me. Mind you, most of these relationships I've been examining are long term relationships, where they've been married for many DECADES! ***** Although I'll tell you most of what I know about these relationships, I probably am not telling you the whole story since I'm not in these relationships...*****
Let's start by talking about couple #1, who has been married for ... I think 20+ years. Recently, I found out that this couple is financially doing bad. I couldn't understand why. I heard that they had to close the shop they had for ~10 years and the husband is now driving a taxi. WHAT?? Really?? What happened? I was thinking: did the economy tank so bad that they had to close their shop? Mind you, their shop is like a "all trinkets" type of store. And the business was doing really good for a while, as far as I knew. And later I found out that his business started doing bad since a few year ago but he didn't tell his wife about it. I also noticed that he was always out and about, and never really at the store. We went by there a few times last year and didn't really see him there. His wife works for the US government and the store was his "thing". And because they had joint bank accounts, the invoices for the business were all paid for them. Appearantly, the wife didn't know what was going on with their business. AND he lied to his kids too. Two of their kids were going off to college and they needed money for dorm, books, etc. Instead of telling their kids about their situation, the husband wrote checks for them and they all bounced! How embarrassing for the kids! And now, their house is in foreclosure. And the husband's response to this: "oh, it's okay. we can go back to our country." Wow..really? All of his kids grew up here and have been in this country for over 20+ years and just because he made a bad decision, they should all be up rooted to be in another country they know nothing about? And I also heard that the husband and the wife aren't really on talking terms. How sad, right?
So, what did I learn from this couple? No matter how bad the news may be, it is better to embrace the situation together than to try to solve the situation on your own. You are married and should be PARTNERS in all your decision making. Not just when it's convenient for you. You shouldn't choose what you situation should be appropriate for discussion. All and everything should be shared.
Next up: couple #2. This couple were together for 27 years! But they are now getting a divorce. Why? Well, simply because he cheated. Okay, maybe there's more to it than that, but I don't know. The wife is who I know and she said it's because he has been having affairs the last few years they were together and she just found out about them. So, the story goes something like this: the husband's father was sick and the couple decided to let his parents come and stay with them. Well, as the father got sicker and sicker, the husband was further and further. Of course, they also had two children. And the parents and the children were watched after by the wife, while the husband was gone. He always had "business meetings" and "business trips" he had to attend to. And the wife was a "home-body" and didn't really go out as much. And when they did go out, they were always hanging out with people who looked up to him since he was a big shot. Of course, he asked why she didn't laugh at his jokes or why she didn't do this or that. And she didn't much about these then. And she thought everything was okay between them two. Fast forward a few years ... she found out that he was cheating on her this whole time.
What did I learn from couple #2? It's always good to have a date night every so often and it's always good to do a "check in" every once in a while. Find out what the person is thinking about as far as the relationship goes. And what your future plans are. Remember to not expect your significant other to be a mind reader.
There are many other couples that are having a GREAT time of their lives being together. I'm getting a bit tired...so I'll write about them in a little while...
Yes Ladies and Gents...
I'm realizing that the key to a happy marriage is all about COMMUNICATION. Of course, I'm starting to notice various things about different relationships that surround me. Mind you, most of these relationships I've been examining are long term relationships, where they've been married for many DECADES! ***** Although I'll tell you most of what I know about these relationships, I probably am not telling you the whole story since I'm not in these relationships...*****
Let's start by talking about couple #1, who has been married for ... I think 20+ years. Recently, I found out that this couple is financially doing bad. I couldn't understand why. I heard that they had to close the shop they had for ~10 years and the husband is now driving a taxi. WHAT?? Really?? What happened? I was thinking: did the economy tank so bad that they had to close their shop? Mind you, their shop is like a "all trinkets" type of store. And the business was doing really good for a while, as far as I knew. And later I found out that his business started doing bad since a few year ago but he didn't tell his wife about it. I also noticed that he was always out and about, and never really at the store. We went by there a few times last year and didn't really see him there. His wife works for the US government and the store was his "thing". And because they had joint bank accounts, the invoices for the business were all paid for them. Appearantly, the wife didn't know what was going on with their business. AND he lied to his kids too. Two of their kids were going off to college and they needed money for dorm, books, etc. Instead of telling their kids about their situation, the husband wrote checks for them and they all bounced! How embarrassing for the kids! And now, their house is in foreclosure. And the husband's response to this: "oh, it's okay. we can go back to our country." Wow..really? All of his kids grew up here and have been in this country for over 20+ years and just because he made a bad decision, they should all be up rooted to be in another country they know nothing about? And I also heard that the husband and the wife aren't really on talking terms. How sad, right?
So, what did I learn from this couple? No matter how bad the news may be, it is better to embrace the situation together than to try to solve the situation on your own. You are married and should be PARTNERS in all your decision making. Not just when it's convenient for you. You shouldn't choose what you situation should be appropriate for discussion. All and everything should be shared.
Next up: couple #2. This couple were together for 27 years! But they are now getting a divorce. Why? Well, simply because he cheated. Okay, maybe there's more to it than that, but I don't know. The wife is who I know and she said it's because he has been having affairs the last few years they were together and she just found out about them. So, the story goes something like this: the husband's father was sick and the couple decided to let his parents come and stay with them. Well, as the father got sicker and sicker, the husband was further and further. Of course, they also had two children. And the parents and the children were watched after by the wife, while the husband was gone. He always had "business meetings" and "business trips" he had to attend to. And the wife was a "home-body" and didn't really go out as much. And when they did go out, they were always hanging out with people who looked up to him since he was a big shot. Of course, he asked why she didn't laugh at his jokes or why she didn't do this or that. And she didn't much about these then. And she thought everything was okay between them two. Fast forward a few years ... she found out that he was cheating on her this whole time.
What did I learn from couple #2? It's always good to have a date night every so often and it's always good to do a "check in" every once in a while. Find out what the person is thinking about as far as the relationship goes. And what your future plans are. Remember to not expect your significant other to be a mind reader.
There are many other couples that are having a GREAT time of their lives being together. I'm getting a bit tired...so I'll write about them in a little while...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
